Sexism in Hiking Starts Before You Even Hit the Trail

If you're a woman who hikes — especially one who's done or considered a thru-hike — you already know what I'm talking about. It's not just what happens on the trail. It's what happens at the dinner table, at work, in the parking lot at the trailhead, from the people who love you most. The unsolicited advice. The thinly veiled skepticism. The "be safe out there" that nobody says to your male hiking partner.

I wrote this before my AT thru-hike because I was fed up. Years later, I'm still fed up. So here it is, lightly updated, still a rant, still meant for every woman who's nodded along and wanted someone else to say it out loud.

What I want you to take away from this post is not my begrudging disdain for the questions I, and many women hikers I know, have gotten. What I want you to walk away with is this statement ringing in your ears and rolling off your tongues, repeat after me:

"I will not tell an aspiring thru-hiker what they should do, how they should do it, or ask them why. I will simply encourage them and ask questions about the things that I do not understand in a polite manner."

In the most benevolent way I would like to remind you of the statement: "Hike Your Own Hike." I will hike my hike and I will prepare in my own way. You will hike your hike or live your life and mind your own business.

What People Need to Stop Saying to Female Hikers

Directives

Unless asked, don't tell any hiker what to do or how to do it. If I need help, I'll ask! Believe it or not, most embarking thru-hikers have done tons of planning, research, and adjusting. We may not be confident thru-hikers yet, we may need to adjust some things along the way, we may even be out of shape — but that does not mean we are not prepared.

~~"You should ____"~~
~~"Why don't you _____"~~
~~"This is how you _____"~~

Discouragements

Do not EVER tell ANYONE that they cannot do something. The world is your freaking oyster. Your parents raised you on that line, I'm sure, and they may have lost it along the way. Mine never did and I am so glad they didn't. Do what you want, how you want (as long as you don't harm others), and with as much zeal as you can muster. This is what life is ABOUT.

~~"You can't ____"~~
~~"You shouldn't ____"~~
~~"You'll experience ____ out there"~~
~~"Is ____ on board with this plan?"~~

Stop telling women not to go by themselves — they really are safe out there and are probably completely aware of the risks they are taking. Quit pointing out how hard, long, and physically taxing the trail is. We know. And please stop asking if we're afraid.

Damn straight most of us are terrified and will be terrified at least once out there, but we are being brave and doing an incredible thing. Stop pointing out the negatives and get on our side.

The Safety Lecture

The majority of unsafe events — murder, rape, animal attacks, death, kidnapping — that happen on or near the trail come down to three things: 1) Someone camped too close to a trailhead and someone from the outside world with a car came in and hurt them. 2) The hiker was unprepared, uneducated, or did not take the proper steps to ensure their own safety. 3) A freak accident occurred that was very unfortunate but unpreventable.

~~"It's not safe out there."~~
~~"You're going alone?"~~
~~"How will you survive?"~~
~~"Are you bringing a gun?"~~

No, you do NOT need a gun out there. You probably won't even use your pepper spray — but if it makes you feel better, bring it.

If you don't sleep on your food, you probably won't attract any animals other than mice. If you camp more than 5 miles from a trailhead, no one from the outside world is going to work that hard to "get you." If you are prepared, educated about the wilderness and survival, and you do your best to stay safe, you will be fine. And sometimes accidents happen — but they happen in the real world too.

One last thing on this: STOP TELLING WOMEN TO BE SAFE WHILE TELLING MEN TO HAVE FUN.

I have heard time and again — and I'm 90% sure any female hiker will tell you the same — that everyone told me to "be safe" while our male hiker friends were told to "have fun." You may not realize it, because society has some powerful conditioning skills, but this differentiation is sexist and discouraging. Women can have fun AND be safe. Men can do that too, but women are my point here.

What to Say Instead

Words of encouragement:

"Wow, that's an amazing journey you're starting!"
"I'm sure you'll meet a lot of great people out there!"
"You're going to make it all the way, I'm sure!"
"How inspiring!"
"That's really brave!"

Substantial questions:

"What does a trip like that entail?"
"How long will you be gone?"
"Are you excited?"
"How do you prepare for something like that?"
"What places are you passing through?"
"What are you most excited for?"

Genuine interest:

"I'm really interested — would you mind sharing how I can experience this with you?"
"Will you be documenting your trip anywhere?"
"How can I get involved?"

HYOH — And That Includes the Opinions

I love my family and friends. I appreciate that they worry about me and care about me. But please recognize: the trail is relatively safe, I am prepared, being a woman does not make me any less capable, and I can do it all by myself.

Sexism in hiking isn't always loud. It's usually quiet — it's the "be safe" instead of "have fun," it's the assumption that you've thought about this less than you have, it's the surprise when you know what you're talking about. It starts long before you're anywhere near a trail.

All I ask: think about what you say and how it affects people. Not just in reference to the trail, but in everyday life.

Be excited for us. Encourage us. And let us find our way for ourselves.